Saturday, February 27, 2010


Wooow. I can't believe the amount of questions I've gotten on formspring. I have to admit, I wasn't expecting so many. But I'm pretty excited about it. I'm glad to answer every question as best I can. I'm also glad that some of my readers have expressed what else they'd like to see on my little ol' blog here.

This past week has been CRAZY with the weather we've had. So much rain, oh man. I really dislike precipitation in all forms at the moment. I'm so glad to finally be seeing the sun today.

On the bright side, I did get to try a few new things this week.

Koka Mocha probar from Maya and Eliza.
I've actually never had a probar before up until Monday. I was expecting it to be more like a larabar for some reason? But it was totally different - kind of like a cross between a larabar and a regular granola bar. This one had hunks of chocolate, almonds and coconut in it! Can't fail there, that's for sure. It was lightly sweet, chewy and dense. I'd definitely have it again should I ever find one.

And this morning, I decided to try out a Justin's PB packet on my second breakfast. I don't have a picture because I'm ridic and my camera had no battery power. But, I used the whole packet on top of a fage with granola. I was expecting it to be like PBCO cinnamon raisin PB, only sans raisins. But once again - I was surprised. The peanut butter was much more thick and "peanutty" in consistency - not all runny and soft like the PBCO stuff. It was really quite good, definitely different, but I actually prefer the thicker and less sweetened taste to it. Its too bad they don't sell it around here - I'd be willing to switch my allegiance of flavored peanut butters for this one.

BTW - not my new thing - but Stef is having her first give away. New veggie cookbooks for someone out there! She's such a sweet heart.

Now, to address something I have a feeling some of you have noticed. I don't post every thing I eat here, obviously. I don't even always write about my "victories" in terms of challenges eating wise. Why? Because honestly - to me, it is JUST food. I ate dinner at McDonald's a week or two ago. I had pizza at work a few nights ago. I went out for drinks last Friday, and had a rum n coke, and a shot. I had my dad's french onion soup with croutons and cheese. Do I take pictures of all these things? No. Because I don't want to feel like I need to prove something. And in reality - there is nothing to prove. I eat what I want. Do I generally eat healthy foods? Yes. I also eat out of convenience, and that does tend to mean I eat a lot of the same things, because they are what happens to be in the fridge all the time. My parents don't keep things like cookies or pancakes or what have you in the house all that much, so I don't really get to eat those things unless I've gone out or I've gotten to put some input into the grocery list. That's what makes them treats though - the fact that we don't have those things in our house all the time. It may mean that to some of you - I only eat "safe" foods. But I personally don't see anything wrong with the fact that I primarily eat healthy food at home. When I go out to eat (usually about 1-2X a week) - you can be damn sure I eat what I want regardless of whether its an omelette with hash browns for lunch or a chocolate chip muffin for a dessert.

At the end of the week, I feel happy and free. And if you ask me, that's more important than meeting some checklist or quota of the number of times I've eaten outside of my staple foods.

Speaking of which, here's today's lunch:

Summer Pasta Salad ( 1 cup pasta, 1TBS each olive oil and Thousand Island, dressing, 1/2 cup broccoli, 2TBS raisins, 1/5 raw tofu,plus some crushed red pepper and romaine)
Pasta salad is my favorite food to eat in the summer - its light and refreshing but still really nutrient dense and good for you. Plus I just love pasta. And since the sun has finally come out, I'm celebrating with summery food.

About half a cup of frozen strawberries alongside 6 squares of G&B maya gold chocolate may have also been eaten as a little dessert....^.^
Yeah, after I had that mini-bar from Maya and Eliza, I kind of fell in love with that stuff.
No shame.


  1. this post is awesome. i really love that you don't feel the need to write about food "victories" bc to you it's just food. that is so...NORMAL! lol! you've come a really long way in the time i've been reading your blog, and i think you'rev ery inspirational tori! keep at it!

  2. I am totally with the fact that we don't always need to write our victories! I have so many every day/week, like muffins from the cafeteria, pizza, fries, I don't mention if I don't have a good recipe or story to share. Otherwise my blog with be boring: it will just be about picture of food, nothing else!

    I wonder what dreid fruit taste like in salty stuff. It sounds weird yet delicious. Maybe I'll try it :)


  3. I don't mention everything I eat either. Just the highlights or something new I tried. Losts of the things I eat are repetitive as well and I just think it would get boring to look at after awhile. It's great that you are fine with going out to eat and not staying at home with safe foods. Eating out should be enjoyable because you can try things you normally don't have the opportunity to have.

  4. hey lovie! :)
    ah i love that ProBar they are so good, and i agree with your description! also about the Justin's ahh i wish they sold that near you, it is really quite affordable and they sell them in containers like PB&Co! and also love your pasta lunch love the addition of raisins, raisins + anything is good to me, i must try this! :)

    not photographing your food is such a great thing, and for you i think that is really great, becasue i know for a while my blog and maybe you as well, it was as well as being a each snack nad meal...and i felt like i had something to prove to everyone and myself, and it really shows a lot that you do not find the need to prove anything to anyone, because being confident in your food choices and just eating because we need food to live and its JUST FOOD as you said, that is so true...and being "normal" and flexible with going out to eat and having a balance of healthy and not too healthy foods is amazing...also when challenging food fears the "world" doesnt always have to know about it, you know? ;P haha...

    ahh(random) lol..but i just remembered your post a long time back lol when you had chocolate for the first time in forever( i think it was G & B) :)... and you were so proud, gosh lovie, i cant even tell you how proud i am of you, but i am sure you are tired of hearing that ;) but i just love you, and really beam with happiness when i think of you, and the strides you have made thus far.

    love you babe.

  5. Love this post! And I'm the same: love Mac, having a pizza or whatever...but it's just normal, nice but nothing special and that's the way it should be:)

    Have a great weekend girl!

    xxx Julia (Taste of Living)

  6. Torri, you are so awesome ;] I really look up to the way you eat!


  7. I think you´re 100% right!
    If you don´t feel like blogging everything you eat, then you don´t have to. You don´t have to prove anyone anything.
    Loved your post, by the way. You´re strong, girl.
    Have a wonderful week!
    Brazilian XOXO´s,

  8. Hi Tori,
    I just wanted to say that yours is one of only about two blogs I still read. I quit reading recovery blogs b/c it seemed like a "recovery ED" community to me rather than true support to get OUT of ED jaws.
    BUT-I have followed your triuphant journey for years now and you have no idea what a role you've had in helping me finally REALLY turn things around and take on my own life.
    When I first started reading I was inspired by your dedication and also admired your ability to identify and tackle any issue. You have also taught me the valuble lesson of doing what it counts to get where you want to be, and that taking it there one step at a time is not necessarily "cutting yourself slack" but rather, making SURE YOU GET THERE.
    When I first started reading your blog I expected you to get stuck, your thinking was so off with what a "high calorie" diet or good weight was...but then I saw it was YOU who kept on keepin' on, chipping away at one barrier after the next [physically and mentally], while I, who wanted to "take it full force for REAL" wound up at my lowest point last Christmas.
    Since then, largely inspired by your tenacity, I finally made the REAL change. This time, I didn't "flip a switch" except the one determined to do what it takes, each step of the way, until I reach my goal.
    And finally, I'm really getting there...and I almost can't believe it myself.

    Thank you.
    -BubblesBlossoms [from CC forums]

  9. p.s. I think you are coming to the spittin' image of a healthy life for life to it's fullest:
    1. one that meets your physical needs [the healthy + amount part
    2. One that allows you freedom [it's not ruled to "only eat X calories of X foods"]
    3. One that challenges any external forces [ED!] trying to tell you what you should/shouldn't eat

    keep on keepin' on! here's to doing the impossible :)

  10. yummy lookin eats there! looks like fun and socialness too!

  11. I keep seeing these PRO BARS around, and desperately want to try one! Are they just in the states?

  12. I love your philospophy on food... I think it's important to get away from the food obessions when recovering. Thus, your "it's just food" attitude is perfect :) You're more focused on living life, which is the best way to be!

    Additionally, I really like the whole treat thing to. Treats are meant to be just that, treats, not all-the-time constant accesss staples. If you eat treats all the time, then they're not as special. That's not restricting or sticking to "safe" foods at all, I consider that simply sensible eating!

    And your pasta salad looks amazing :) Hope you're having a great day!